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NY Apartment ($70 mil) - The Penthouse at the Pierre

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A recommendation by RichardNouveau

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I'm handsome because I'm handsome; you aren't handsome because you aren't handsome; this is why, this is why, this is why I'm handsome.

Oh, excuse me, I didn't see you there-one of my hobbies is translating rap lyrics in such a way that drains them of their charm yet highlights their grammatical intention. After I finish a good translation session I take a long, relaxing walk to the bathroom, where I look at myself in the mirror and practice angling my neck so as to indicate a spirit of jauntiness. After that, I take a longer, brisker walk to another bathroom, where I catch my breath while taking a bidet, then stand behind a shower curtain until Marisol comes to clean it. Then I jump out and clap sharply while screaming "Sorpresa!" (via Pocket Change NYC)