Things That I Could Use To Crush My Broken iPod - a list by HomerFish

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About this list:

I hate my iPod because it's broken and that makes me mad. In order to constructively channel my aggression, I created this list.

Qualifications:

I have deeply satisfying fantasies about destroying my iPod

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Viewing 1-6 of 6 Items

Resin and Marble Elephant Statue with Upturned Trunk

First to recommend

Description

This was a hard one to pick out. Most elephant statues I browsed were made of delicate materials like soapstone and were hand-carved in third-world countries. Somehow buying a fragile item that might break in the process of breaking my iPod Classic seemed so...wasteful. The description from this particular statue says that the elephant's upturned trunk bestows blessings and good luck. So I'm thinking: Good luck and good riddance, iPod!

Updated Jul 25, 2008

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Polished River Rocks

2 people recommended this item

Description

These little beauties would be both effective at smashing my iPod AND decorating my driveway. They're really cheap, too. Score!

Updated Jul 25, 2008

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Craftsman 15.5 hp 38 in. Deck Lawn Tractor - CA Model - Model 28601

First to recommend

Description

I picked this ride-on mower because it earned 5 out of 5 stars at Sears, and because it's one of the most affordable lawn tractors I could find. So I know that it will be effective in crushing my defective technology - at an unbeatable price!

Updated Jul 25, 2008

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1 comment

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Mannheim Steamroller Christmas Celebration: Mannheim Steamroller

2 people recommended this item

Description

How rockin' is Mannheim Steamroller! Everytime I hear the Carol of the Bells it makes me want to ... uhm... prepare my house against burglers cause I'm Home Alone?

Updated Dec 2, 2008

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Mountain Boggan 4-Foot Toboggan

First to recommend

Description

I live in Los Angeles, so this is more of a dream than a realistic goal, but how fun would it be to put my iPod at the bottom of a hill and then SLED OVER IT?! That, my friend, would be living life to the xtreme...

Updated Jul 25, 2008

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Frye Lisa Tall Inside Zip (Black) - Mid Heel Boots

First to recommend

Description

Not only are these Frye boots fabulous, I think that the heel would make an incredibly satisfying crunch as it breaks through my poor little iPod's casing. I dig the contrast between the brown heel and the black leather, and the hidden inside platform will make me feel even more powerful against my piece of broken technology. Muwhahahaha!

Updated Jul 25, 2008

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Viewing 1-6 of 6 Items

HomerFish

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