The Ironic Housewife - a list by MeganInMunich

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About this list:

We sisters may have run screaming from the kitchen to the board room, but we all still have to eat and that bed isn't going to make itself. This is a list for those who refuse to sacrifice liberation or cleanliness. If you have to do it, do it with style.

Qualifications:

I vacuum with a sardonic smile and raised eyebrow. In heels.

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Audrey Cupcakes Apron - Jessie Steele

First to recommend

Description

The best way to work off those calories is to give him incentive to lift your skirt. Frost them well and he'll definitely eat your cupcakes. ;-)

Updated Jul 31, 2009

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Hostess Pink Green Dot Dishwashing Gloves

First to recommend

Description

The quickest way to betray your age is your hands darling. Protect them and the truth for as long as possible, wear gloves when cleaning and washing up.

And buy a dishwasher to keep this activity to a minimum.

Updated Jul 31, 2009

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Pink & Leopard Dishwashing Gloves

First to recommend

Description

Ideal for any Desperate Housewife.

The perfect way to protect your hands while still being fashionable and comfortable - these rubber gloves are ideal for cleaning, dish washing, gardening, and anything else that could spoil your manicure.

Updated Jul 31, 2009

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Tie Up Peep Toe Heels - Ellie Patent

First to recommend

Description

Practice your sexy and sultry walk in a pair of these while vacuuming or when gliding down supermarket aisles.

Updated Oct 9, 2009

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Jessie Steele Aprons Bib Ava Brown & Pink Polka Dots

4 people recommended this item

Description

He may not get this subtle ironic nod to the gender role bias he's enforcing by sitting his lazy ass on the couch while you tidy up, but you'll have the satisfaction of having mocked the cult of the patriarchy.

And hey, if you're gonna clean, be cute about.

Updated Jun 22, 2008

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Ostrich Feather Duster

First to recommend

Description

Ostrich feathers only seem decadent darling. They're actually still the best duster around, attracting dust instead of just swishing it about. And speaking of swishing attraction, this baby is big enough that it might just double for an impromptu fan dance that will remind his lazy ass that you are definitely NOT his momma or his maid.

Updated Oct 9, 2009

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Orange Headscarf

First to recommend

Description

"Cleaning is active work. Keep your look fresh and keep stray hairs from falling out of place by employing headscarf."

That is so what a 1950's housewife guide would instruct you to do right before telling you how long in advance you should your hero's martini for when he comes home.

I say wear the scarf while drinking the damn martini.

Updated Oct 9, 2009

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1949's Bullet Bra

First to recommend

Description

Let him know how dangerous you can be with a vacuum while wearing this bullet bra. If he gets too close, he could lose an eye.

Updated Oct 9, 2009

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Back-seamed Stockings

First to recommend

Description

Is he still sitting there while you tidy up by yourself? Here's a line for his eyes to follow...and then maybe cross.

Updated Oct 9, 2009

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Suspender Belt

First to recommend

Description

A little something slinks to keep your confidence and your stockings high as you balance on that ladder to dust the top shelf.

Also, good for occasional flashing of the milkman or the Beaver.

Updated Oct 9, 2009

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