RNC
(40 items, 1 shopping guides)
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Motorola H350 - Bluetooth Headset
1 recommendation
"When you're balancing one kid on a hip and making dinner for your family how can you possibly keep up with affairs of the country? With your bluetooth headset, now all you need to do is mute the "Don't touch -hot!" and "Only if all your homework is done" from the conference call."
Kazuo Kawasaki Palin Style Glasses
1 recommendation
"You too can get your very own Palin style glasses by the Designer Kazuo Kawasaki! When you want to look like a bookish, smart, small town girl and pay hundreds of dollars for frames alone!"
Stars & Stripes Bikini
2 recommendations
"If McCain and Palin follow in Bush's footsteps they'll have a lot of vacation time while in office - and what better way for Palin to show her patriotic spirit than in an American Flag Bikini!"
Official NBA Tack-Soft Basketball
1 recommendation
"Sarah Palin used to be point guard and captain of her high school Basketball team where she had the nickname "Sarah Barracuda" because of her competitive spirit. She also lead the team in prayer before every game."
Doodle Undid Juno T-shirt
2 recommendations
"Uh oh, Bristol Palin... this is one doodle that can't be undid... "That ain't no Etch-A-Sketch.""
Vanity Fair Magazine Subscription
1 recommendation
"Bristol Palin is doing a shoot for Vanity Fair like Demi Moore's famous pregnant belly cover... Now all she has to do is marry a younger man... I think Haley Joel Osment might have reached puberty?"
Easy Mac Macaroni and Cheese Dinner
1 recommendation
"Dear Levi, You're the Cheesy to my Easy Mac. Love - you and me kissing in a tree - then comes marriage then comes the baby in the baby carriage, Bristol Palin"
Cable Knit Moses Basket
1 recommendation
"Juno MacGuff: Wait... No! I mean, can't we just, like, kick this old school? Like, I have the baby, put it in a basket and send it your way, like, Moses and the reeds? Mark Loring: Technically, that would be kicking it Old Testament. Gerta Rauss: ...So, we all agree that a closed adoption is the best decision for all involved? No closed adoption here... the "liberal media" is involved now..."
PENNZOIL MOTOR OIL
1 recommendation
"Let's drill all the oil out of Alaska, and if we have to get rid of the wildlife first just send the Palin family ahead with a shot gun. Perhaps the same shotgun used to make Levi wed Bristol?"
Juno
1 recommendation
"The movie that inspired it all.. perhaps... it would be exactly the same if it was Bristol's first time and then she didn't marry Levi and she gave up the baby for adoption and if she had actually weighed her options... then it would be exactly the same story..."
Benjamin Air Rifle
1 recommendation
"Do you go out hunting for Elk and Moose and Squirrel with your kids? Why not? It promotes good Christian Conservative values... and gives your daughter enough time alone in the house with her boyfriend."
Customized Speed Series in Yellow
1 recommendation
"I hope that Levi wears yellow track shorts and runs to the Republican National Convention... And Bristol can wear an orange striped shirt and be snarky... how cute would it be?"
Juno the chair orange recliner
1 recommendation
"I wonder if we can find out where Bristol's conception spot was... and then make pins out of it to pass out... with campaign slogans written across... something like a Ford F150 truck bed with "McCain/Palin '08"!"
Dude Abides classic t-shirt
3 recommendations
"I guess the "First Dude" of Alaska wants to move to Washington to be the "Second Dude" in Washington?"
Vintage Magic Screen Etch A Sketch #505 by Ohio Art
2 recommendations
""this is one doodle that can't be undid, homeskillet" Unless of course your mom takes the heat for your doodles, and you get to have "mono" for four months..."
High Achiever Trigonometry
1 recommendation
"Sarah Palin's fifth child/first grandchild- whomever is responsible - is named Trig... maybe after the class Bristol was in when he was conceived... or maybe there was a math book laying around the hospital...?"
Prague Women's Patch Pocket Lamb Leather Blazer
1 recommendation
"Running off to a press conference to discuss your recently announced Vice Presidential Candidate Nomination and have nothing to wear? Grab a Leather Blazer... it's KINDA sorta business like.... right?"
World's Best Condom Sampler Tin
1 recommendation
"Everyone knows that Sarah Palin is all about abstinence only education... but one has to think... what would the press have to write about if she had told her kids about condoms?"
John McCain Political Halloween Mask
2 recommendations
"Sure to be seen on the streets of San Francisco this Halloween."
I Only Date Republicans Tee
4 recommendations
"Washed-soft and faded tee printed with a graphic message at the front. Exclusive to Urban Outfitters. Made in the USA. Machine wash."
Hamburger Phone
33 recommendations
"You'll graduate to a Blackberry someday, but until then, why not talk into a hamburger?"
Snug & Dry Diapers Disney Jumbo
1 recommendation
"Hey Bristol, I think the jumbo size means that you don't have to empty it as often... but hey, I wouldn't know I've never had a kid, even though I'm almost 10 years older..."
Barracuda Mount
1 recommendation
"In High School Sarah Palin's nickname was "Sarah Barracuda". The moniker stuck even through her mayoral and governorship because of her aggressive tendencies in politics."
PennySaver.com
1 recommendation
"It might be too late for Bristol to put an ad in the Pennysaver to give away her baby... unless her mom decides to "adopt" it."
Fahrenheit 451 : Ray Bradbury
1 recommendation
"Sarah Palin tried to fire the local librarian for not banning some books when she was mayor.... it's a slippery slope to burning books from there... P.S. GREAT BOOK!"
Miss Beauty Queen pageant crown tiara
1 recommendation
"Sarah Palin came in second in the Miss Alaska contest in 1984... but she did win the "Miss Congeniality" award and a scholarship!"
Citrus Punch | Sunny D
1 recommendation
"Drink up... so you can take that pregnancy test Bristol... I mean another pregnancy test in another 5 months..."
Annie Leibovitz: A Photographer's Life, 1990-2005 Book Hardcover
1 recommendation
"Annie Leibovitz is slated to photograph Bristol Palin for Vanity Fair... I hope she doesn't catch mono before the shoot."
